My profession

Psychiatry is a funny profession. Many people become embarrassed around a psychiatrist or that's the way it seems to me.  There's always a pause after the revelation and many times a joke about what I must be analyzing in my new acquaintance. I was a dietitian before I became a psychiatrist and people would also get embarrassed when I answered the question about my work especially if I met them at an event that involved food.  People often would immediately self consciously cover their plate or make an awkward remark about how they don't always eat this bad. What's with me anyway why did I chose two professions that make people uncomfortable? Do people get self conscious when they meet a cardiologist or a pediatrician?  Maybe dentists conger up regrets about not flossing enough. But I don't think other professions hit the same insecurity nerve that psychiatry does.  I can understand it. I barely knew what a psychiatrist was before I went to medical school.  Nobody I knew went to a psychiatrist. We only went to the doctor if it was serious such as a painful swollen outer ear infection or a broken bone. Fortunately we were not sick much because we did not have health insurance. My only exposure to psychiatry and mental health growing up was a sinister psychiatrist on the soap opera General Hospital (I actually don't remember how the plot went but he was duplicitous for personal gain of some sort) and the social worker that came to our house concerned about my brother, sister and me being homeschooled. My impressions were not favorable.

But maybe it's not my profession that causes people discomfort though, maybe it's me, my demeanor.  Perhaps I looked at that woman at party who's overweight who had that gigantic piece of apple pie with ice cream as if to say you better lay off or you are going to lose your toes and your eyesight to diabetes, honey.  To the pastor who just welcomed me to his church, perhaps I conveyed a sense of knowing his inadequacies that were made more evident by his sermon's self-revelatory content.  I mean I never thought that I was judgmental previous to my marriage but my husband tells me that he sometimes (maybe more than sometimes) perceives a judgmental attitude in me. I usually tell him that he is wrong but then I wonder what does it mean to be judgmental. Isn't it the perception of the other person what makes someone's attitude judgmental? So then it would be only the other person who could say whether I am judgmental.  But then some people's perceptions are inaccurate.  Some people are paranoid, others have a negative bias and others are influenced by preconceived ideas.